So after a 2 month break from blogging and having finally laid the bones of my website down, I am ready to blog and spend much more of my time communing over here than on the ever-calling-to-me Facebook.
I actually have a back log of posts, that at moments of inspiration, I quickly tapped out into my note’s section on my mac.
Today’s post, to kick off my blog/website revival seems fitting for what is transpiring on the planet at the moment. Posts such as this one rush into my brain space involuntarily, usually at the fertile phase in my cycle. It is a phenomenon that I have observed for the past 3 years now. Our creativity naturally comes in cycles, often for women…linked in with our menstrual and moon cycle. If we can see it happening, feel it happening and then allow whatever needs to come forth, out…gifts from the universe are given to us.
Here’s one that surprised me. It shouldn’t, because my own life interactions with others often get me thoughtful and wondering, as do stories that my patients tell me in my day clinics when I am treating them. I hear, see and feel their suffering and search for understanding, healing and insight. When they leave my rooms, I continue to think about them, to find deeper meaning to their suffering, to help find answers…or perhaps just know where to file it away in the life of mystery filing cabinet. When I let go of these thoughts, at some point later when my thoughts drift…divine inspiration hits and my thoughts form.
Here is one such thought. It may or may or not resonate with you. If it does, feel free to share it and comment. I would love to hear your thoughts.
Written a few months back…
I think that Most of the worlds problems could be avoided if we chose to first see, then acknowledge and then respond accordingly when we are either choosing to be ‘zippered’ across the juncture where I end and you begin, or unzipper that connection and view another as a separate or non-separate being from me. If the universal law of ‘we are all one…we are all connected’ is true, then we need to permit our ego minds to disbelieve for a moment what our eyes only let us see…Me standing here and you over there. If after an argument with someone over the phone, each person is ‘upset’ but alone with their feelings. What is connecting them? They both, energetically are feeling the unzippered effect in play. Cognitively, they are profusely trying to separate and demarcate the lines of where ‘me who is right’ and ‘she/he who is wrong’ is drawn. These overwhelming and uncomfortable feelings catapult our ego’s into overdrive to ‘protect’ us from ever feeling this way again…flight, fight, to take us away from feeling yuck. But emotionally, even if one of you is sad and the other is feeling self righteously angry, you are still connected to each other. So if say, it was a mega argument that found each party going their separate ways, never to talk again. Silence, moving on, living their own lives. They/you are still connected by the emotion. The connection may be half unzippered but you still carry the other person somewhere deep inside of you. Why is it that they are still there?
Because we are all connected. There is no separation. A flicker of a reflection of that which we reject in ourselves, which we saw in the other, makes us unzipper from each other. All people are gifts in our lives. Those we remain zippered closely to are mirroring to us the qualities we like about ourselves and that which we wish to project out into the world and live with. Those that we are unzippered from have reflected our shadow sides in some way or tapped into deep fears or core beliefs about ourselves. Those parts of ourselves that we are not yet ready to see, let alone embrace. But those sides of ourselves are still in us. It is easier to reject another whole entity and downplay and allow our ego’s to convince us that we are separate from them, than to acknowledge that ‘what I see in you, is also in me’. Either way, like it or not, we are still them and they are still you. You are still connected. You are part of the universe, as are they. You can only be one, even if on a visually projected plane, you have been split into two…or many. Wouldn’t it be easier, if we could suspend our absolute belief in our ego driven thoughts long enough to truly ‘see’ what gift the unzippered from self person has proffered up for you to learn and become more whole by?
What an amazingly evolved person/people we could become. Fighting throughout the world would disappear. We would be an evolved people/race, living harmoniously and in peace. It would be amazing wouldn’t it? If we could all as individuals, rise temporarily above our ego’s, for a split second. Work on ourselves. Forgive others for perceived trespasses. We would be on the road to recovery and a rich, rich life.
It’s a long journey. But we each should start from where we are. Shouldn’t we?
x Tanya
I believe we are all connected!
We definitely are Chandra. If I hurt you…so I hurt too. xx
You have a beautiful vision. The feeling of connection. A unified Utopia. Care for each other. Share with each other. What’s mine is yours. What’s yours is theirs. Because we are one front. We share the same joys. We have the same fears. We support one another. Humanity can only hope to have an outcome like this. To be connected with everyone.
I cannot explain why I feel a connection with one person, sometimes even the second I lay eyes on them. And sometimes with people I meet, I instantly know this is a one time event only. There is no connection at all.
I truly believe that the people who come into our lives, come and go. Some will stay only a brief moment. Others stay with us our entire life. Some stay longer, sometimes for years, decades. They leave us because of death or because we have outgrown friendships, the connection is just not there anymore.
Your vision is truly wonderful. Unfortunately, there are still many many people around on this planet who have a taste for wealth and power. Hence the battles and the wars. And sadly (and very pessimistic), I don’t think that will ever ever go away.
Great post Tanya! Food for thought.
Thanks Renee. Yes, if only we could all focus on how similar we are instead of different. I read something recently this week that suggested that most wars and relational divisions occur because individuals are feeling insignificant in some way that makes them feel a deep need to demand that they be seen and treated as significant in this life. Some will go to desperate measures to force an external result, that to them, demonstrates in some way that they are significant. We all need to do our own inner work, heal ourselves…grow, so that we don’t thrust our demands externally on to the world and others. Nobody can meet my needs but me. It’s unreasonable to expect anything else. The best thing we can do is teach our children to see how similar we all are as emotional beings…that everyone has their own gifts, with much uniqueness to offer the world…without competing in a power-dominance way. I recently grasped the essence of the non-permanence of life and the fact that suffering only occurs when we have attachments to things, to people, to ideas of how life should be. How freeing it can be when we become detached but still connected. I struggle with day to day relationships some times, but I refer back to this concept of detachment when suffering looks like it’s trying to sidle in next to me as a bed fellow. If only the whole world could know at exactly the same moment in time, that the key to true happiness is in giving to others…it’s the most wonderful feeling in the world! Thanks Renee 🙂 x
I find this subject very interesting indeed. I totally believe that we are connected. That said, I also think that the universe (or God) plans for certain disconnects to occur so that growth can happen. Sometimes people grow complacent, or stagnant, or are simply too close and each party wants to dominate the outcome of the particular situation. About five years ago, I finally found 2 particular friends I have been “carrying” around for over 30 years and several others who were childhood friends I had disconnected with due to a traumatic experience in my life and relocation 3,000 miles away from them. One friend was simply astonished that I had found her. That I was even searching for her. She had hurt me and never ever thought she’d see me again. Truth was, I had forgiven her decades ago and moved on, hoping to find her. (She had been in the military and then remarried.) I actually found her via Facebook, by typing in one of her then brothers’ names, connecting with him, and then asking what her new name was. Everyone I found filled a void in me left by their absence and I truly believe that is why I often felt something missing, even though my life was busy and full. Now my personal life circle is complete. My past and present are connected and it’s a good feeling. Everyone I found also couldn’t believe that I had actively been searching for them all these years. I think it was Steven Spielberg who once said that the reason he made the Star Wars saga out of order was because technology (graphics and computerized special effects) hadn’t caught up with his vision yet. I had to wait for technology, too, to catch up with my quest to reconnect. Patience, prayer, and persistence are powerful. Great post!
Thanks Robin for your thoughtful and wonderful comment. What a great story and how awesome that you found those friends once again. So happy for you that your personal life circle feels complete…a wonderful thing indeed! Yes, I too believe the disconnects are mean’t to occur to enable growth. I think we choose to utilise our ability for ego separation to enable the disconnect to occur with those we have an attachment to but perhaps have crossed some boundary (I plan to post about boundaries in a future post). Perhaps those people become the bottom part of a really long zipper and remain as part of the rich tapestry of the fabric that we wove together with them. If we can reconcile that those people are no longer mean’t to be in our lives and can acknowledge the gifts of learning they gave us, then we can allow the essence of them to remain somewhere in our fabric mesh of our past. Perhaps then the zippered/unzippered effect only really comes into play in a conscious way with those we are currently in relationship with, where we are processing the dynamics and possible resistances they bring up in our relational dynamics with them. Perhaps this perception of being separate from someone can only occur in the present…with those who we are interacting with and who bring up self protective responses to reject them or separate from them. Because the future is not here yet so we can’t anticipate a relational aspect with those others and the past is already zipped up and dealt with? You have me thinking again lol! Thanks Robin 🙂 x